A Lack of Everything

As I'm sure most of you who read regularly have noticed my absence.... again. I have recently been diagnosed with an extremely severe case of Laziness and Procrastinate Personality Disorder. These are self-diagnoses of course, but nonetheless, quite accurate. I've found myself suffocated by a lack of almost everything. Here's a list for you.

1. Lack of Motivation.
I feel like (excuse my French!) a fucking broken record. I know I don't curse much on here, to avoid offending any readers, but this "lack of" bugs me the most, and I feel like I complain about it all the time. I've been suffering from every kind of mental block you can think of, from my art to my social life, and it's driving me bonkers. Today, after doing a half-assed cleaning job on the inside of my car (pardon me, again) and then getting a mani-pedi, I spent the entire rest of the day watching every episode of The Office on Netflix from season 1. I only got to the end of season 2. Talk about productive. Somebody, please help me?

2. Lack of Inspiration.
Just about as bad as the first, also kind of goes under the same category as the first, but I'll separate it merely for the sake of making my list a little longer. My "art life" pretty much no longer exist, which is pretty sad. Sad meaning pathetic, because I'm totally capable of creating art like I used to. But, because of combined lack of motivation (hello no. 1) and inspiration, my sketchbook is collecting dust. Not helpful when I'm currently applying for a scholarship to take college art classes for five weeks at MTSU and they kind of need to see a sketchbook during the portfolio review portion of the interview, and I have nothing current to show. Did I say pathetic? So, I bought a new sketchbook last weekend and as I was trying to throw down some kick sketches, I realized how much ability and skill-work I lost in my months of laziness. It's totally biting me in the butt. Now I have to practice, practice, practice.

3. Lack of boyfriend.
Holy smokes, I'm talking about my love life. I really try not to do this on the internet too much, especially when I could be writing to strangers (but I think I know most of my readers). This is just a touchy subject. Those who do know me know that my boyfriend and I broke up during the summer, not because we wanted to, but because he has a military father like me and had to leave. Recently, we've lost contact. For good? I don't know. But it's for the time being. At first, it made me sad. But after thinking about it, I've realized that it's a good opportunity to start dating again without feeling guilty. I'm the kind of girl who loves having a boyfriend, unlike some girls who just complain about how much drama they come with. No, the guys that I've dated, which haven't been very many so far, relieve drama for me. It's comforting. I'm not saying I'm the girl who HAS to have a boyfriend, I just enjoy having one. So if you know anyone who's single... Just kidding. But seriously. But just kidding.

4. Lack of computer.
This has happened before, and I'm using it as an excuse for my inability to post on my blog regularly... My personal laptop is down again, and I don't know why. The internet just refuses to open. Cool, huh? Anyway, so I have limited access to all of my documents and photos and stuff, so it's kind of hard to post from other computers in my house. #firstworldprobs 

So anyway, I know this is a long post, but I thought I owed you guys some explanation. As for my art thing, I'm actually trying to find some motivation to start a new project. I love landscapes and I took some great photos of my aunt's backyard while I was out of town. Not that anyone knew that I was out of town because I'm too freaking lazy to log on here and tell you guys. Oh well, sue me.

My aunt's backyard and possible painting project.

I am actually going to try to work out an actual schedule for my posts. I'm thinking either twice a week or once a week. My life isn't very interesting so I don't want to bore anyone with unnecessary posts about what I ate for breakfast.

Also, please keep visiting Speak Now's website at wespeaknow.org. My next post won't be until November, but other posts are rolling in frequently, so there's a lot to check out!

Last but not least, I would reeeeaaaallllyyyy like some feedback. I don't get any responses from my readers, if I have any. If you don't have a BlogSpot or Google account, and you can't post comments directly on my blog, e-mail me at starvingartblog@yahoo.com or comment on my Facebook page! I would really like to hear from someone, anyone who has suggestions, post ideas and topics, or if you just have any questions. Or you just want to say hey. That'd be nice too.

I'm off all week because my school is weird and has a week off for Fall Break. So, I'll be sleeping in suckers! 

Happy Tuesday!

(shout out to Lizziesapien for being the best motivator evarrr)