(First off let me just say that Lizzie's post was not at all professional but she doesn't lie and all those hard cold facts that she wrote made me cry like baby. No joke. I love my best friend.)
Wow. Here I go again, talking about boys. I feel weird talking about this since boys haven't been taking up the majority of my free time lately (shocker), church has. I'm so blessed to have finally found a church that I truly connect with and will be a part of my entire life. My journey to Catholicism will end in the spring, but my faith won't stop there. But turning away from the future and looking at the present for a moment, this church occupies my Wednesday, Sunday, and every other Monday evenings. And I'm loving every bit of it.
Okay. My little rant about church is over for this post. I'll elaborate another time. Now I'm going to talk about how I spend the small portion of my free time that's left over after church, school, and weekends with the crazy lady that wrote my last post and her boyfriend. Thinking about boys. My gosh, it sounds so juvenile when I say it out loud. But it's really true. I've been single for what feels like years but really has only been a few months and I'm going crazy. My wonderful lady friends all tell me the same thing:
"You don't need no man in yo life! You're a strong, independent woman who can take care of herself!" and all that jazz. I know I don't need one. Heck, who needs 'em anyways? All they do is eat your food and, well, yeah that's basically it. But it's never been that way for me. The boys that I've dated (I only count about two) were so good to me. They didn't use me, abuse me and whatever else rhymes. They treated me like a princess. Homemade Christmas gifts and romantic ways of asking me to Winter Formal first semester, and when he didn't work out (Lord, I might be crazy for letting that one go) an even better fellow came along and bought me dinners, held me close when I cried and made me laugh until I could feel the abs form under my belly. Now that he's gone too, I'm left with little 'ole me back at square one eating homemade snow cones by myself. How I miss that summer.
But "square one" is actually quite accurate. This time last year, I had a date to Winter Formal. I had my dress and the shoes, he had his adorable matching tie. We danced like dorks and kissed like we were the only ones on the dance floor when "Don't Stop Believing" blasted in our ears. Now, I'm left with obvious choices, hoping desperately that I won't have to spend the night of Winter Formal alone in my room complaining to all of you. Because frankly, my friends are even getting sick of me talking about how single I am. I don't want to say I'm desperate, even though I just might be, because being desperate means being vulnerable. I don't ever want to be that. I want to be the strong, independent woman my girl friends think I am. But really, all I want is attention. All I want is to fall in love again with someone even better than the last. Someone to last forever. Or I just want a date to Winter Formal. Baby steps.
Complaining put aside, it's the time of year to be thinking about the things in my life that I do have, not the things I'm missing. So here's a list:
Things Emma is Thankful For:
- Her family. Duh.
- Her friends. I finally know who my true ones are.
- My church. You know the deal.
- My home. With disasters around the world, corruption, hate, etc. I'm so glad to be safe, sound and happy. Because deep down, I know I'm happy.
- The ability to do what I love. Starting new projects (Thanks for the watercolor paper, Daddy!), being able to blog to all of you; these things aren't possible for some, and I can't tell you how thankful I am for the relief they bring.
It's a short list. If I listed every little thing I'm thankful of, you guys would hate me for such a long post (rain, sunrises, clean paint pallets, long weekends, etc).
IN CONCLUSION: I hope you all have a fabulous Thanksgiving. Spend time with your family, give your best friend a hug and eat some pumpkin pie. Done.
Lizzie: I didn't spell check so don't come at me with any corrections and such. Loveyakbye